A Story about Glue - and the Incredible Hulk.
Just another day here.
Photo by Daniel Cheung on Unsplash
Ha.
You see, it’s the time of year when little green men keep showing up in our house when we’re asleep. Yup, you got it - the leprechauns are coming to town.
This morning at breakfast she asked when the little green men are going to visit? I told a small lie and told her that this year they have a much bigger area to cover now with tariffs and higher pricing - they need to cover a bigger area to collect all the gold coins this year to hit their fiscal goals, so I told her not until the 12th this year.
In other years when I was younger I would start from March 1 onwards with the hiding tricks those little buggers have done. I have had them play with stuffed toys, make green drinks at the table and all kinds of random stuff. I tried to do something with Cheerios last year and the dog ate them so I won’t be recreating that this year - the things you learn.
Anyway, this morning the child decided she needed to make trap for the little fellas so she could catch one. “They’re fast and small” I told her “maybe we could skip making the trap this year”
She looked at me like I had just told her there’s no Santa Claus and then said to me: “When you’re at the dollar store today..”
I had no intention of going to the dollar store today but later today I was there picking up green glue, glitter, felt and beads and ribbon - anything green so she could trick out the Amazon box we had picked for the trap this year.
When I came home from Uber-ing there was a trap at the ready for the little guys and it was decked out with all the bling and we were ready for little green men in the house - we are ready with a trap!.
The rest of the evening went as planned: Dinner, a little dancing to AC/DC (thunderstruck) and then she went to her room and I started to clean the bathroom because, well, that’s my job here.
I come out of the bathroom to the child waving her bright green hands saying that she’s the Incredible Hulk. “Aarrrrrgh”, she moans at me.
I take one look and I know this is going to take a while to clean up. I was not wrong.
Remember the green glue I bought? Want to know what happens when you leave a 7-year-old alone in her room with a bottle of green glue? You create a big honking mess for Dad to clean up, is what happens.
I may have expressed my disappointment in her actions. Twice, at least.
There was glue on her ankles! How do you get glue on your ankles? I get her all wiped down and in clean non-green PJ’s and then start to attack the mess that was her bedroom. I can deal with finger paints and washable stuff - but glue? It’s sticky and tacky when it’s half dry and it’s just a freaking mess.
I hosed down a My Little Pony today so it could live to tell another day. I can’t say the same for the McDonald’s toys that got glued together.
I half-filled a big black industrial garbage bag of paper and coloring books with pages glued together and a whole bunch of broken crayons and some stuff I don’t even know what it was - it’s gone now - that I do know.
I still have to tackle her floor tomorrow because the crap on her floor needs an intervention before I let my new roomba in there to do the daily cleaning again.
Where’s BW when all this is happening? She’s hiding in the family room where it’s safe.
See? I told you she was the smartest one of the bunch here.
Until Next Time,
TH and Co.
PS: Don’t miss tomorrow - It’s the big Leprechaun trap reveal!