Tidy Husband

Eligible for the seniors discount and the Happy Meal deal at the same time.

  1. The Costco Run

    We went in for one thing. We left with more.

    We don’t have a Costco where we live. There’s one being built right now, but it will not open until Spring 2026.

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    Photo by H&CO on Unsplash

    This means when we come down to PA to visit family, one of the things we do is a Costco run.

    This time we went in because I could use a nicer looking sweater and I wanted to look a the electronics to see what was on sale and also to see what a 100 inch TV really looked like. spoiler alert: It’s HUGE.

    I’m happy to report that I came out with the sweater. I’m unhappy to report that we also came out of Costco with another $200 worth of stuff. And it’s not even good stuff. No food, no pac-man gaming table or book or toy of any sort

    What did we come with? Essentials. Stuff like olive oil, and a few dog bones and when the heck did 2 rolls of aluminum foil start to cost over $25.00? I know things are more expensive now, but holy smokes.

    We did not come home with any cookies or cakes or sweets or chips or any impulse purchases of the like. We also left the $10,000 massage chair there as well. Who goes to Costco and in addition to the family pack of Cheerios says to themselves: I might as well just get this overpriced massage chair while I’m at it.

    Not us. We get the bare essentials and and get the heck out of Dodge before we spend any more money.

    BW bought some shampoo and that’s about as bougie as our time at Costco got.

    I offered to buy BW a hot dog seeing as this is as close to a date as it gets where it’s just the two of us alone in the same room without the child but she declined my offer.

    I think she’s holding out for a better date night than a Costco hot dog. She’s probably expecting candles and wine and flowers for a real date like “back in the day”

    And I know just where I can get the flowers:

    Costco, of course. But she will have to wait until the Spring.

    Keeping the economy going,

    TH and Co.

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  2. Hampton Inn or Bust

    It’s been a day. But now she’s asleep

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    Greeting from the Hampton Inn!

    We’re more than halfway and my little queen is asleep in her king-sized bed.

    We are away from home for 4 days, but with the way the car is packed you would think it was for 40.

    With the drive on the way down we should have maybe taken the Ark instead. We beat the snow, but not the rain and it was a little white knuckle in spots with all the darkness and shiny lights and reflections.

    The dog is at a new sitter’s today. One we’ve never tried before because why use a tried and true place when you can just leave her with a new family with a small white dog and a cat.

    These are 2 things the dog was not familiar with until today. When I left all the amimals were still getting used to each other, but the sitter texted me a photo of the dog zonked out on her couch, so I think the dog is getting used to the idea.

    It was a busy day of cleaning and packing and planning and figuring out how to disasseble the dog crate so it would fit into the car but somehow we made it:

    1. We’re at the sleep hotel.
    2. The dog sitter hasn’t called with a problem
    3. Tonight was the easiest bedtime ever. She could not wait to get into the king sized bed.

    Maybe we should go on vacation more…no dog, easy bedtime and somebody else makes the bed in the morning. A guy could get used to this.

    Sleeping like a King,

    TH and Co.

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  3. The Sleep Hotel

    Not too big and not too small. It’s just right.

    She was so excited today.

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    Photo by Vojtech Bruzek on Unsplash. Not exactly as shown. Results may differ

    You see, tomorrow we’re making our trip to see family a day early due to the upcoming storm we don’t want to get caught in. The plan was to leave Wed am to go down to Pennsylvania to see family and do the thankgiving thing.

    But.

    Then we heard the weather forecast. This means leaving in the afternoon tomorrow and by then it’s already late but we should be able to beat the snow at least. It’s a long drive so BW decided that at a little over halfway we should stop at a hotel.

    Or…as the child calls them: “The Sleep Hotel”.

    I wish I could tell you that this was an all expenses paid resort vacation, but in reality it’s a Hampton Inn off the highway. We should arrive about bedtime and we all get to sleep in th one big KING SIZED bed.

    There’s one rule I have never broken with her and that’s to let her sleep in the same bed. There’s a reason for this - you don’t get any sleep!. BW even asked me my preference on one bed or two and I yelled “two!” down the stairs when she was booking the room.

    She booked the one king sized bed instead. I don’t think she likes me any more.

    But! The child is off the charts excited. It’s 10:30 at night when I’m writing this and she has just gone to sleep after many attempts on my part. I bet she came down at least 3 times to tell me all about the Hampton Inn.

    She’s been once before, so she’s an expert.

    “Did you know they have a fireplace?”, she asked me. She then told me they have washrooms in the lobby and I had to tell her again about the king sized bed and how big it is.

    “It’s big”, I tell her.

    “How Big?”, she asks.

    “As big as my little home office”, I reply.

    “Oooooooooh”, she says

    Then she asks if there are fancier hotels and I say that yes, but usually not off the highway with a Panera next door so we’ll keep that trip saved for another day when we go to a really fancy place.

    “You know” I tell her, “Somewhere nice - like the Holiday Inn”

    fSafe travels out there,

    TH and Co.

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  4. Tablet Buddies

    Saturday Nights on the Big Screen

    Back in the day, it would be the newspaper where everybody would be at the table eventually reading as the night progressed.

    33 more days folks.

    Now? It’s screens.

    Today was much much better than yesterday and BW did the morning shift with her where they ended up running an errand and going for ice cream!1 and in the afternoon I was the one she was with so it all worked out.

    We played what BW calls “the lovefest” where we are just silly on the couch together and there’s no real game per se, but over time one gets made and there’s lots of laughs and tickles.

    After dinner we played some more doing random silly things and over dinner we played a game where I spelled a word and she had to guess it and she did great. She might have absolutely zero athletic ability like her dad, but she’s miles ahead with the vocabulary.

    Then, she was driving us crazy with the Christmas planning and how we had to have a ‘party” so we told her to go entertain herself so she found her tablet, water bottle and “Don” and went downstairs to watch.

    BW wasn’t feeling well and was zonked out on the couch but I didn’t want to go and hide in my man cave so I grabbed a laptop and farted around on my computer on the kitchen table.

    After a bit, the child came upstairs and joined me and now there were 2 screens. Mommy started to feel better and grabbed her phone - this brings us to the three of us all doing our own thing on the screens.

    But somehow it felt like we were all together at the same time. We were all in the same room relaxing and the odd time there would be an interuption for a story or suddenly breaking into a dance routine.

    The poor child. This is about a wild a Saturday night as it gets here when your parents are eligible for the seniors discount.

    She did get some ice cream in November and to stay up late playing on her tablet so overall it was a good night for all.

    And with that, I will say good night. It’s way past my bedtime.

    Oh, speaking of bedtime - tonight was super easy. It seems like we’re back on track.

    Keep reading,

    TH and Co.

    1. And BW says I’m the one that spoils her. ↩

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  5. I AM the Entertainment

    Sorry kid, but this is the best it gets.

    Photo by Dominic Hampton on Unsplash

    Today is Tuesday

    Want to know what happens on Tuesdays around here? Not much.

    Today was no exception apart for the fact that she had a haircut appointment after school to break up the monotony a bit. Also, when she goes to the hairdresser she gets to have a lollipop while in the chair to distract her from scissors and itchy hair.

    Hey, it works.

    The haircut was uneventful other than the fact that after she finished, her stylist gave her a going away present of a Ring Pop on the way out the door. Of course, the child asked if she could have the much coveted Ring Pop?

    “Sure, I told her. Mommy’s not home, just don’t tell her when we get home”(she told her)

    In the car on the way home my freshly shorn friend in the back seat with the sugar high asked if she could watch “shows” when she got home. (For those that don’t speak our language, “shows” are movies/videos on YouTube Kids. )

    I said no. I told her she’s on her own for entertainment, and for a small amount of time when we got home she did just that - entertain herself. But, like all things here what becomes an absent-minded thing I do somehow while trying to fold laundry at the same time - becomes a game - and tonight was no different.

    Tonight, we played hide and seek with her favorite stuffed animal stuffed into a pencil case. I have no idea why or how poor Don got stuffed in there, but he did.

    “Don”, BTW is her favorite stuffed animal. A quick search of the archives shows I have written about him at least once. Here’s one:

    What started as her and I just being silly with each other somehow becomes a game with complicated rules that include that the hiding must not be too tricky or injure the dog in any way.

    And instead of hiding and closing your eyes when you count while the other person is hiding poor Don - you have to put a towel on your head and call it the Towel of Shame while you stand in the middle of the kitchen.

    So, ya. We played hide and seek with Don stuffed in a pencil case all while having a qustionably clean tea towel on my head.

    But that’s not all. She came upstairs later with a space ship made out of magnetic tiles and once again - before I know it we’ve got a full on game going on where I am the stormtrooper while holding a white plastic fork and she is “Mr Clear”, because she’s holding a clear plastic spoon.

    The trivets on the table are the planets. Mars, the Earth, Moon and Sun were all represented and I am happy to report that we’ve travelled the galaxy and back with nothing but a full imagination and some plastic cutlery.

    She then went upstairs and had a shower/bath where she runs the water and fills up the tub at the same time and while there heard the toilet still running because - l ike the sink - it’s another bathroom item that needs some TLC because she now lives in the house and stuff is mysteriously getting broken.

    Surely, it’s time for bed - no? OH NO.

    Say hello to snack time. After some negotiation I managed to get her to agree to a mandarin orange. But again - I am to blame for this - We had to get Mr. Fork and Spoon out again and play a silly game where they are the chief and constable of the local police and they have to solve the crime of the orange slices that keep disappearing.

    She eats this stuff all up (literally) and with wide eyes asks me if it’s her turn to eat another orange slice as the plot, as it were - progresses. Yes. PLEASSE eat the orange slices so we can go to bed! That is the storyline - you eat oranges and gotto bed!

    Next: teeth and bed. But not so fast - remember when I allowed her to have not one but TWO lollipops back to back? This was a poor parenting choice on my part as she was well, wired for sound.

    She came down and watched me on the computer for a bit and asked me how I can type so fast and if I am writing AI? I replied no, and then we attempted the bed time thing one more time.

    As I was tucking her in she asked for a story.

    “But, tell me a real story. Not a story about a girl like me that doesn’t go to bed”

    Little does she know that she is the story. Every Day.

    Me? I’m just the entertainment.

    Sweet Dreams,

    TH and Co.

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